And then, there are some days when I stare at important documents, emails, registrations and speeches and all I see are words.
Take today for instance; today would be a great day to focus. Beyond the things that hinder me, there are campers registering for summer camp, caterpillars signing up for Chrysalis, a sermonette to be prepared for Thursday and a speech to be critiqued on Saturday. Today should be one of those focused and inspired days, but instead, it is a day where I am lost in my thoughts, my eyes seem blurry and all I see on my desk are words.
The cause: anxiousness (the enemy)
I am anxious about all the words I will have to use in the varying situations of this week. What words do I put where? What words do I use in the tricky and controversial situations, the speeches that are meant to inspire and to the friend struggling just to make it to tomorrow?
Words change the world. Words are the start to every powerful movement. Words from the Bible tell us how to live, love and give. Words in a job description tell us how to work. Words in a poem show us how others have fought and conquered.
Today, I have no words.
When I let anxiousness rule me, I find myself in this wordless, unmotivated blur. I keep picking up my work and going through problem solving in my head but I quickly lose focus and find that the things that worry me overrule the things that I can control.
I have a key verse for this point in my life: Philippians 4:6
This verse has been sticking with me for the past few weeks and it wasn't until this week that I truly learned why I needed it (it's funny how God works that way). This week is challenging in many different ways and focusing is becoming harder by the minute, yet the Lord has already instilled in me the perfect reminder and scripture for this time.
Although it is hard not to be anxious, I know God hears my prayers as I present Him with my requests. Although this time is challenging, I give thanks for my blessings and the lessons I am learning as I grow through each situation.
I am wordless because I am anxious. If I loose my anxiousness, I will find my words. Thanks be to God who takes away my anxiousness and gives me the words that He wants shared in all situations.
Time to get back to work.